November 21, 2006

update to this nutzy day

Well it's about 7:10pm. The greenbeans I prepared are pretty much done. My mom is downstairs right now preparing the dressing. The turkey tastes wonderful. Yet I just don't feel great. My dad called about 15 minutes ago and asked to speak to my mom. So I gave her the phone but the answering machine had picked up and i could still hear HIS side of the conversation.

So I go back up the stairs and I happen to hear him ask my mom that he was talking to someone he knew who was looking for a secretary. He asked my mom if he thought I would be interested in it because it had day hours and appearantly higher pay. As well as if I work strictly day hours then I would be able to go to school in the evening. My mom said yes so he then asked to speak with me. I told him it sounded ok and he asked me if I could see him tomorrow around 1pm. I told him I had work and wouldn't be off till 5pm.

He then says he would call me back and he does 5 minutes later and tells me the guy wants to meet me 9am in the morning tomorrow. I was tad bit shocked but said ok. I'm not sure what to really think. When I was at Express Scripts I was in front of a cpu screen, sitting in a chair, doing my work, yet I was miserable most of the time. I'm not sure if I want to get back into the same setting. As they say all the world in the money doesn't mean shit if you aren't happy.

Yet I also wonder the flip side of the coin, am I happy at my gig now? Being on my feet, my knees hurting, my mind wondering making sure I'm doing everything right. My head hurting, dealing with customers who can be such assholes, yet also dealing with customers who can be so sweet. My co-workers, some who I have known for such a long time and I consider them like a second family to me. I've been with this company 6 years. That is the longest I have EVER been at a gig. I enjoy my hours being able to get to work between 1oam to 1pm, or pretty much whenever I'm scheduled. yet I love when I have a day off. I don't have to worry about what to wear because I have a standard uniform.

At Express Scripts it wasn't easy having to get to that damn job by 8am yet I LOVED being off by 3:30pm. Plus it could be a pain in the ass to figure what I wanted to wear for the day.

My parents say one day I need to quit the job, then say the next day keep it so just in case you need to get something you will always have the discount. I remember when I first started working at Express Scripts I was literally going to quit my present gig back in 2004. Yet it was my parents who stated I should still keep it as a part time gig. So here I was working 2 gigs for close to 2 years.

I'm not sure what to think. Should I be happy that I have this opportunity? or should I stay where I am most comfortable? I'm not sure what to think these days? Sometimes I wonder am I being pushed around so it benefits myself in the end or others?
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