January 4, 2016

No New Resolutions

 So yea, I'm late in saying HAPPY NEW YEAR and all that other pizzazz. A few days before New Years Eve I was wondering to myself what resolutions was I going to make. I then decided I wasn't going to do any because I just seem to disappoint myself every damn year. Do I have goals? Yea I have them but I'm not going to get too crazy with them and drill them into my head. That has been my mistake in the past. Thinking about them over and over again until I was so stressed out when I would fail at them and then feel like a nuclear bomb just went off in my face. Then that would just give me another thing to be depressed about. So I'm going to just try to bring more order to my life and try to give myself a schedule to throughout the week to check in with myself on the things that I want to do.

I will be starting back up my college courses January 18th. Right now I'm in rebuilding GPA phase. I did receive my associates from STLCC but that was just for general transfer studies. So now I need to get my GPA in order by retaking classes that I know will scare me to death. Calculus and Micro Economics......I feel as though every time I think of them an image of Darth Vader comes to mind and he turns on his red light saber and I have to be ready to do battle. Yet thankfully I'm not taking those courses this semester. I'm retaking a science course via online so I should do ok. I also have to start saving money so I can have money for school because I don't want to have any loans. Am I wishful thinking? Honestly I feel as though I'm running in a long corridor and that finishing college is the door all the way down the hallway and every time I am going towards it, the door just seems to stretch further away from my grasp.

Working out is yet another goal that I need to re-solidify into my schedule as well as eating healthy. I was doing good before Thanksgiving but afterwards it was a downward spiral I never recovered from. My right knee is giving me issues and I'm scared I might have to go through what one of my coworkers had done back in November (knee replacement). If I can avoid it I will try my hardest. I'm still seeing my therapist and she even recommended a book for me to read called The Four Agreements: A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom (A Toltec Wisdom Book) by Don Miguel Ruiz.
 So I'll pick up a copy and give it a turn and see what I can gather from it. 

I also decided to give my main blog (this one) a face lift and get it redone, which is the current look that you see right now. I also saw a template finally I like to use for my photography project. Hopefully once all changes are done in this blog and finalized I will start on that website. Will 2016 be different then all the other years before? I want to believe it will be.


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