April 12, 2012

From Both sides of the scale: Life

Life, is a gift that is amazing from beginning to end. How we come into this world is just as fascinating and no less as important as how we go out. I was debating on writing this blog post because I was worried about how some might "deal" with it. So I finally thought to hell with it. I'm just gonna put it out there so I won't have it stuck in my head anymore.

Last month a cousin of mine and his wife were in a severe car accident. Click here for article--> Right Here. They were on their way home from helping my cousin's sister with some moving boxes. They were hit by a young lady who was severely intoxicated and the end result was my cousin being severely injured to the point that we didn't think he would make it. Unfortunately his wife did not make it and was pronounced dead on the scene. These past weeks have been nothing but trying for my cousin's family with endless vigils at the hospital and prayers for a successful recovery.

They had to keep him in an induced coma because of the extensive internal damage that he suffered. Tubes were running out of everywhere from what I could gather. He had severe lung and intestine damage. By the time he was starting to show progress was a week later. The doctors had instructed my Aunt (his mom) to not inform him of his wife's demise. They feared the shock would be too much for his already traumatized mind and body. He was eventually told a few weeks later.

His wife's family was holding out on having her funeral until he was able to leave the hospital. When my mom told me this I was kinda like "what?" On one hand I can understand the logic because they want him to be able to say goodbye to her one more time, but on the other hand I was thinking it might not be a good idea. He might not want to have the last memory he has of her being in a casket. In the end I'm not sure if he went or not. All I can think of is my cousin having a strong will to live and wanting to fight to still be here.

Now this past week, my mom informed me of another family member this week who also had a brush with death. This family member unfortunately was so depressed and unhappy she felt the only way out was to commit suicide. She found some liquid drainer and apparently drank the majority of it if not all of it. She was sad because she had lost both her foster parents and some other close relatives to her within a year. She lost her house and she just couldn't cope. Thankfully she was not successful in killing herself but unfortunately she has become legally blind from the effects of the liquid drainer.

After I heard this latest story I went to my room and just thought of these two different scenarios (brushes with death), with almost similar endings but from two completely different beginnings. In the first story my cousin did not have any control in what happened to him or his wife. I put the blame fully on the individual that caused the accident. I don't have any sympathy at all for her and I hope they put her under the jail. She destroyed more than 2 lives that night.

On the second story, it's harder for me because in this story, my cousin did have control of what was happening and I feel that there is nothing too much that you shouldn't feel as though you can't talk to a friend or family member for help. Yet I was not in her shoes so I don't know what she was thinking or feeling. I can only speculate. Yet after hearing her story I can only remember when one of my first cousin's back in 1994 committed suicide and she was my age. I was angry because she was gone and felt that she should have been able to come to someone, ANYONE to talk about her problems. She felt the only place she could get an answer was at the end of her dad's pistol. I still think of her from time to time and when I go through old photo albums I always wonder about what she would have looked like at my age and what she would have done with her life.

Overall I love both of my cousins and I wish for them to recover both physically and mentally.

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