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November 8, 2019

R.I.P. Kaiysha Naima Sharpe-Morrow



This week seems like a blur. I never thought I would be writing R.I.P. to one of my best friends. I would have never guessed that this past weekend would be the last I would ever lay eyes on you.
Some people come into your life and they are leaves...other people comes into your lives and they are branches......then there are those who come into your lives and are roots..... You most definitely were a root.



Yet you didn't come into my life until we met in high school. The very first time I met you was when we both were in The Bridge Program at University of Missouri Saint Louis (UMSL) which met Saturday mornings from 8am to 12pm. I was entering a classroom and you were already there surrounded by some other students. I thought wow she is just so beautiful and has a really outgoing personality. It isn't a surprise why she would be the center of attention.

I kept mainly to myself for the most part. I think within a few weeks of the program she came over to me and asked my name. Yet it was so funny...

Kai: Hey there

Me: Hi

Kai: What's your name?

Me: Jasmine

Kai: Cool, my name is Kai

Me: Nice to meet you.

Kai: So what high school are you from?

Me: Rosati Kain

Kai: Oh boy, you not stuck up are ya?

Me: No I'm not, (chuckle)

Kai: Cool, we can be friends

Me: (Looking at her with a blank stare) Ok


After that we just clicked, hell it was more than that. We just gelled. We found out that we were both born in February. She was born the day before me. She lived on a street that happen to share the same name as my middle name. Not to mention there was another street within close distance that was the name of one of my other best friend's (Trenton). Along with another street named Moore, which happen to be my boyfriend's last name. I kid you not...... Then we found out that our dads knew each other. My mom had taught her Aunt Kim. It was as though the stars had aligned in some way for us to meet.

 Throughout high school even though we were at different schools, she went to UCity and I (again) was at Rosati Kain that didn't stop us from calling each other and hanging out all the time. I would be over house or she would be over mine. She even dragged me around to different clubs. If we went over to the East side we knew it was to go pick up some Fried Shrimp, Chicken wings and fries from some joint that had a drive through.

She invited me to her cotillion and she looked so beautiful. Her dad was so proud. When I tell you that they busted a pose that had me think the next best rap album was about to come out.


LOVE THIS PICTURE!!!!


Another highlight for us was when I received some New Edition concert tickets from a wonderful friend and he told me to take someone with me. Kai was down to kick it and we had a blast! I'm still trying to find that picture. We were in matching black attire and we looked so clean!

She knew of my issues that I was having at my high school with me being bullied. She along with Kamina and Amy (two of my other best friends) along with a host of other classmates kept me sane even though I barely graduated. During this time I also met the love her life James and we were like the 3 musketeers baby!!!

(Update 11/9 @ 2:50am) I can't believe that I forgot to add that during prom season in our senior year of high school we found out that we had bought the same dress but in different colors. We had not talked about it beforehand. We were describing our dresses to each other and then Kai says, "Jasmine who is the designer for your dress" When I told her she just started squealing on the phone. We couldn't believe how much we thought alike and how close our tastes were when it came to clothes. It was a highlight in our friendship out of many that always popped up in our conversations.

We even had bought a pair of boots together in different colors from a store at the Galleria (that had since gone out of business). Her pair was brown and mine were black. We would coordinate our outfits whenever we could so we could wear our boots. LOL


2 of my best friends ( Kai and Mina)


Then we graduated from high school. Kai moved into the University Meadow apartments across from UMSL's campus which happen to be less than 5 minutes from my house.... Man when I tell you I have so many memories of that place! That was also the spot where I had my first taste of an alcoholic drink. When I tell you to this day she teased me about my dancing fingers....a story for a later time.

We did everything together....to the movies....shopping...just sitting and talking about our lives...we were just that in sync. Then one night I get a phone call and she decided to up and move from Saint Louis to Deltona Florida. I had to shake myself awake to make sure I thought I heard her correctly. When she repeated it I was like.....WTF!!! You just up'd and moved?! That was the type of person that Kai was. She was just Fearless. If she wanted something she went after it with full steam.

Then she was engaged and married James. The wedding was held here in Saint Louis and I was honored that she asked me to be a bridesmaid. I remember the day of the wedding she called me and asked me to run to Famous Barr at Northwest Plaza. She realized she was not going to make it down the aisle in her heels so she requested a white satin pair of Isotoner slippers since her dress was so long, nobody even knew, except for us.

Then shortly after she became pregnant with her first born Aislyn. When she asked me to be her Godmother I was completely floored. Talk about such a huge honor.




She was in Deltona for a long time and I regret that I was only able to visit just a few times while she and James lived there. During that time frame they added to their family with two more beautiful children, London and JT. Yet I'm so grateful for the sisterhood of friends she did have while in Florida. I could tell she had wrapped herself around some wonderful women. For that I am eternally grateful.

When she moved back to Saint Louis this year we started to meet up more. Not right away but by April/May we were hip deep like nothing had changed. Eventually I was finally able to have 3 of my best friends (Kamina, Kai, and Danielle) finally back together for the first time in June and I'm talking years in which we finally were able link back up together. I made sure that we took a picture together and I'm so grateful we did. The talks we had that night were long and memorable.


This picture was taken June 25th 2019 with the original caption

"These are three of my best friends. Who are sisters to me. This picture shows three different friendships that have different chapters from kindergarten, high school, and 2000.

Even though It's been a long time since we have been able to be together, The conversations we had were as though we didn't miss a beat.

I'm truly blessed to have such amazing women in my life.

If you have friends like these. You are truly rich beyond measure.

#bestfriends
#sisters
#sisterhood "


We were all suppose to originally get together November 9th, this Saturday evening but then it was rescheduled for November  23rd. We were all looking forward to being together again. The 4 amigos back at it again. Now that meetup will happen but one of us is gone forever...


In July we went to an Earth, Wind and Fire concert along with my mom and she took video of me dancing and I didn't even realize it.




Kai and I would have our long talks like we used to have back in the day. She would make me more aware in my thinking with her suggestions. You see Kai was a very spiritual person. Sometimes when we talked she would explain things to me and I would be thinking damn that was on a higher plain that I wasn't even aware of.

Sometimes we would sit on my front porch and just stare at the sky. Looking at the stars wondering what was out there. There were other times we would either sit in my car or her's and we would talk for hours.

She always made me feel beautiful and always believed in me when I would have continuous doubts about myself. I told her she was my local Beyonce, I thought she was one of the most beautiful people I had ever known. I was so proud of the person she had become. She was an amazing woman overall. A great daughter, a loving wife, and wonderful mother.

The last time I saw her was this past weekend. We spent Saturday evening and Sunday morning together. When I left her I gave her a hug and said, "I love you and I'll talk to you soon". I never thought that would be the last time I would lay eyes on her.

I was texting you on Tuesday and Wednesday to see how you were doing and didn't get a response back. Which wasn't like you. So when I heard from your brother it felt like my heart had been ripped out of my chest. I fell to my knees and started sobbing loudly in the back room at my office. I didn't want to believe it. Hell I still don't want to. The weather that day eerily matched my mood. It was cloudy, raining, and somewhat foggy. I had to leave early because I just needed time to process that you were gone.

I went home and just stayed to myself. Still thinking to myself this is just a bad dream and somehow you will call me and then I would end up cussing you out for scaring me. Yet unfortunately that isn't the case.

On Thursday I decided to stay home because I just couldn't sleep. I went out that evening to run an errand and as I was driving home I had a strange feeling and started to bring up some songs on my Google music app.

1. Oasis - Wonderwall
2. Coldplay - Viva La Vida
3. Coldplay - Yellow
4. Beyonce - Heaven
5. Aaliyah - I Care 4 You



When I arrived home yesterday night I stood outside and looked at the sky. It was crystal clear. I could make out the Big Dipper and Little Dipper like we used to sitting on my porch. You used to say you were the big dipper and I was smaller one because you were older by that ONE DAY and therefore wiser. You never let me forget and I never corrected you on it. The tears were rolling down my face. I stared up in the sky for I don't know how long. I didn't care how cold it was. I didn't want to go inside my home. I wanted to stay out as long as I could hoping you were up there jumping from one constellation to the next.





She didn't have to become friends with me, but she wanted to. Her friendship I will always cherish.  I'm glad you knew how much you meant to me. You will always be a 👑 Queen to me. 


I miss you so damn much and love you dearly. 
I love you my sister. 
Take your rest.



I'm sorry in advance if grammar is off, these thoughts have been in my head swimming like crazy since she passed. I needed to get them out.

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